Saturday, July 10, 2010, 12:04 AM
Some might say they want to meet their future lovers, or late grandmothers, but I really wish I could meet myself. As in see myself from another person's point of view. How I look like from the back, how I behave around friends and family, how I talk, how I walk. I want to meet me.
I know there are people out there who dislike me for reasons which are not known to me. Some of these people don't even know who I am. Heck, they've never even met me. So, I want to be able to be in their shoes to see what they really hate about me. I mean, to myself, I may be shy and content, but to others, I may look arrogant and snobbish. There's really no middle ground here. I've seen myself in a different person, and let me tell you something - I don't really like her.
So, from now on, I will change. I will. Believe me, I'm trying. Just now in school, Myra and I had a little talk with Teacher Ruby about stuff. I don't really want to talk about it here, but I do want to tell you this; I want to change. I don't want to be this person right here. I want to be different. I don't want to create a name for myself as this girl who is just plain lazy to go to school, or to help out, or to do anything. People pass judgements, and I cannot do anything to stop that from happening. People make assumptions even before they know the truth. So there's bound to be assumptions made about me that aren't true, right? So, I'm just gonna let that one slide. I'm not gonna bother. I'm gonna be different, remember? :)